It’s been a minute—
I never realize how time flies until I look back and be like “wow it’s been a month and a half.”
Well my friends, after being suspended in an abyss of sporadic depression, grief, and confusion. I spent the last few weeks coming back to me.
Surrounding myself in love, allowing all the good things coming my way to make me more than happy and all in all, re-discovering my priorities.
My therapist tells me its important to write even or (especially) when I’m happy. She told me to write a gratitude list (and even as I write this, I have tears in my eyes because I feel such a huge amount of gratitude in my spirit.
So here we go, Janesha’s December Gratitude list:
- After many years of not seeing her, my mother, sisters and I visited my Great Auntie Hopie in Chicago. She wasn’t able to make it to my wedding and we were all determined to visit her right after. I don’t see my mothers side of the family very often, but as soon as we arrived the love that rushed over me almost overwhelmed me. Seeing my mom embraced by her family left me emotional. It felt different that any other time I had seen them, but it truly felt like home. I am grateful for the time I was able to have, the money that afforded me to travel, and for the love, laughs, and dances shared with my auntie and cousins. Before the trip I really felt like I was in a dark place and believe the love pulled me out and allowed me to “restart.”
- I am grateful for my husband and my best friend. Sometimes I catch myself saying “he’s been so nice to me lately,” and he’s always nice, but it’s like he’s been throwing some extra nice and sweet in the pot lately and been making me feel really special. I find myself continuously grateful that this is the life that God saw fit for me. A man that loves, respects, honors, cherishes me. One who listens and adores me and wraps me in his comfort. Cree gives me such an immense peace of mind. I never worry, he never lets me down (or leaves me alone) and I have nothing but thanks for our marriage.
- I’m grateful for the prayers of my parents and grandparents, of my siblings and friends. I’m grateful because I feel it in my everyday life. The wash of grace and mercy over my life was prayed upon. The grace and mercy and goodness is something that thousands of prayers have resulted in.
- I am grateful that my therapist told me she has seen real progress in me. In my vulnerability and transparency. In letting my walls down and doing the work. It’s been a year since I’ve started seeing the loving and affirming voice who has helped me unpack and grow.
- I am grateful for reflection. With teary eyed and a warm soul, I can say this year has been transformative for my self belief. For truly reminding myself that I am capable, I am a leader, I am everything I want to be. I am grateful for no longer shrinking, for no longer meeting things where they are so I fit in better. I am grateful for growth.
- I am grateful for my friendships. For the people who shake my heart. For the romance. For the love of laughter and happy hours and long hugs and shared memories. If you haven’t read my “Girlfriends Kind of Girl,” do that— because I really love my people.
I could go on and on. And I have to say this was probably one of the three times I’ve written a gratitude list and in 2022 I want to make a better habit of it. I want to encourage you to write your list before 2021 is over. To sit in all that has happened and remember what made you laugh, cry, smile, and dance.
I’m forever a woman of gratitude. My goal is to continue saying thanks.
Stay motivated. Stay organized. Stay inspired.
Love,
JMoore
