Lately, I’ve been journaling.
For me it’s a lot different than writing blog posts and even talking with my therapist and I’ve found it to be extremely helpful.
I have a habit of compartmentalizing once I’ve gone through the emotions of a situation and then no longer being able to fully express myself leading to a lack of opportunity of healing.
Was the a packed statement? yes.
Pretty much— I am that person who can be crying and then once the tears are gone I’ve acted like nothing ever happened.
Yes this is me.
But while I’ve been in this journey of discovering who I am right now. As a 20 something year old adult, wife, and business owner. I am trying to be as honest with myself IN THE MOMENT as possible.
I’ve found that expressing myself during a break down, through journaling, has helped me to discover my true feelings.
And even better it’s almost like taking notes to later make sure I discuss with my therapist.
I’m in the investment part of my life and relationship with myself. Writing out the things I may repeat in my head so that I can affirm myself instead of mentally bury myself with negative thoughts.
The other day for the first time, with a hard lump in my throat and teary eyes, I wrote down…
“I don’t believe in myself enough to be consistent in anything.”
Those words seem….heart breaking.
But for me it was a moment of truth. Finally being able to pinpoint the negative seed I had sown in my head and now that it was right in front of me. No longer lingering alone in my head… I was ready to address it.
I’ve never been a fan of confrontation— but this time I was ready.
And since I had been intentional about documenting where I was in that moment, I was able to work through it later with my husband and my therapist.
It was definitely like unlocking a new level of transparency to really share my bare feelings instead of just downplaying like I usually did.
I don’t have a 100% message this time around, maybe just to encourage you to think about journaling.
Think about being more honest with yourself in the moment so you can reflect and continue giving yourself the opportunity to heal.
That’s all for now, but you’ll be hearing from me more.
Love
J
